craplos: ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
hokeyfright: it’s called the xbox one because it’s been one week since you looked at me cocked your head to the side and said i’m angry five days since you laughed at me saying get that together come back and see me three days since the living room i realized it’s all my fault but couldn’t tell you
cosmo tip #658
expertcosmotips: make him coupons for a free sensual massage that expire the day before you give them to him
getoffmybloghoe: My girlfriend got charged for beastiality because I’m an animal in bed
theoriginalspike: innumerablegibbons: A woman got breast implants made of wood yesterday It would be funny if this joke had a punchline Wooden tit
Hey girl, let's adopt 10 cats and live in an...
0029.) I'm afraid of being a failure and not being...
dampsandwich: WHY CAN’T I FUCKING TELEPORT I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY
that one song that starts playing and you recognize it immediately and you just
Better to be special, than boring.– Keene
onurtrap: Landon Pigg - Falling In Love At A...
you: god, i can't get this icona pop song out of my head. it's horrible.
me: i don't care. i love it.
jad3harley: do you ever reblog something specifically for someone on your dash and they reblog it from you and youre all
taco bell employee: how are you today?
me: crunchwrap supreme
partybarackisinthehousetonight: wow. it’s hard to believe that the number on the back of every sports jersey is the amount of people each player has murdered
kickandbox: Kiss Me - Sixpence None The Richer
r0sekanaya: filling out a job application “are you available for a Skype interview?” …. “no.”
Field trip at 8:30 AM tomorrow
My roommates come home at 1 and decide to have people over and start a party
partybarackisinthehousetonight: that girl you just called green mario? she’s really luigi
warpedlamp: I have found the perfect gif representation of what internet arguments look like.
dampsandwich: how gross would it be if girls pooped